Saturday, July 6, 2013

Great attitude went out the window!!!

Last night after I got home from work, I broke down - more internally than externally.  It was a very crazy busy day at work - had intense itching all day and my skin just burned and burned.  I wanted to ask to leave early, but there was no way because the ER was jammed to the gills.  I got home and immediately went into the tub - no relief.  I was able to sleep but woke up with ooze everywhere and my shirt stuck to my skin in tons of places.  I'm not sure if my intense increase of my flare is work related or just coincidental - but this is my 5th shift back to work in the last 5 weeks and each time I go through the same thing - worsening itch and lots of oozing.  I may just have to take another 1-2 months off because I cannot handle this physically or mentally.  It is after noon now and I am still oozing all over my arms, my back and my chest. 

Sorry to be so down, but this TSW really has a mind of its own and when it shows its worst side, it can bring one to their knees.  I am trying to see something positive in life today....not working for me right now.  :(

There is one thing that is good - hubby put together our new elliptical machine 2 days ago and worked out for all of 5 minutes both days - today I WILL get on it for 5 minutes.  My heart rate went up to 160 the first time and 150 the second day - today I will see how it goes.  Once it only goes up to 120- 130, then I will start using the arm levers and increase to maybe 7 minutes.  My heart has really taken a beating being so inactive the last 4.5 months.  I tried walking outside, but regardless of the temperature, the air on my skin burned after a few minutes.  I would try to cover it up, but it was hard covering my face.  My goal is to get my cardiovascular system back into shape.  I cannot afford to let my body get sick in other areas. 

I have stopped by a lot of blogs today - unfortunately I just do not have the mental energy to comment - very sorry to all my TSW friends out there.  I also still need to update my blog list.  If you do not see your blog on my list, please comment with your link and I will do my best to get them up by tomorrow.  I am trying to compile as many as possible - finding links on other's blogs.  But right now I just need to mentally step away for today.  I need to get to my tub, do my skin routine, take my vitamins, and get on my elliptical.  Then I need to get the kids started on their school work.  I let them play outside this morning before it got too hot outside. 

Here's hoping and praying you are all having a good skin day!!!


  1. Ugh, ugh, ugh! So Sorry that things are crazy. Though I am glad that you have some way of exercising! Little steps, when added up, do come to something! Keep up the awesome work of getting a new perspective. It's still there, just a dark cloud passing over head. It will pass.

    Love you!!

  2. Thank you dear sis! You should count your blessings - I was "this" close to calling you during my meltdowns today!!! You probably would have eventually realized it was me blubbering on the other end but there was no way you would have been able to understand me! I am such a darn wreck today! In between my crying jags, I did manage 6 minutes (yes, SIX whole minutes!) on the elliptical and my HR only went up to 142! It is encouraging to see my body respond so quickly to the exercise!