So I have had enough of my own negativity about this TSW business. Do I have a right to be negative? I sure think so, but it is not productive. Nor does it inspire me to do more and push myself. So today I took a new approach - I regrouped and came up with a plan to get ahead of this thing. You see I have been playing catch up all along. I gain speed in one area only to be brought down in another area. For example....I had the sleep thing down - 2 Benadryl with Tylenol and ibuprofen before bed aloud me 6-8 hours of good sound sleep. But with the increase of pain and lack of moving around too much, I started taking aspirin daily over the past month. It helps with the inflammation and I was concerned about blood clots in my legs. But with all the NSAIDS, I developed an ulcer. I know the symptoms all too well from being a nurse and while I do not agree with self diagnosing everything, some things are just too obvious. So I had to play catch up with the ulcer but in return I started lacking sleep when I stopped the Tylenol and ibuprofen and aspirin. Now that the ulcer seems under control, I am back to taking those and my vitamins. But all of that pretty much explains my recent depression - lack of sleep, lack of energy from no vitamins (they were bothering the ulcer), and inability to eat much due to stomach pain and nausea.
Today I decided I needed to MOVE! I can no longer afford to be so immobile! I am used to running around at work 36 hours a day. I have always kept relatively active and have always had a low heart rate and low blood pressure. My blood pressure has risen over the last 4 months with TSW - could be stress and pain related but it is consistently 20 points higher than my normal. Then I noticed a rapid heart rate with any increase of activity (climbing stairs) - my resting heart rate was always 50-60. Now it is 80-90. That is also not good and a sure sign of stress and lack of physical exercise. But I lack the ability to be able to walk outside like I have wanted to do - my skin still gets aggravated immensely being outdoors more than 5 -10 minutes. I had bought a cheap stepper - but that mimics climbing stairs and I have yet to be able to do more than 3-4 minutes on it. So off I go in a few days to get a treadmill. Not going to get anything expensive as I know once my skin heals I will be exercising more outside where I would prefer to be.
As for the diet - still on it. But made a huge mistake yesterday - had my first gluten in 4 weeks. NOT good! My stomach blew up to about 6 months pregnant looking! I thought I was going to die from the pressure! Luckily I had learned some breathing exercises to get rid of gas! It was horrible! I will be keeping gluten out of my diet until I get past this TSW. It is just not worth it! I did add dairy this past week and am doing well with that. We drink raw milk around here and use raw butter in our food. The raw milk really seemed to help my ulcer. So I will keep it limited as dairy still causes inflammation, but the benefits of the raw milk are worth it I think.
I was able to get some work done around the house - some much needed organizing and cleaning. I blasted the radio to the oldies and the kids pitched in and really helped out - we danced and sang! Of course after 30 minutes I was exhausted, but felt good about what we accomplished.
My skin still sucks rocks! It burns and itches and keeps on spreading! The most painful areas lately are the back of my knees, my left arm, and the left side of my back. I cannot believe the swelling in my upper left arm! It is driving me mad. I am hoping it clears soon - like the front of my neck. I still getting itching and some burning to the front of my neck, but nothing like the first 3 months! It is my calmest area right now - so I hope my arms follow suit soon! I have not been able to sleep on my right side all this time because of my arm.
One good thing I have noticed is that I can now tolerate Vaseline again - was not able to use it during the weeping times - it would make my skin itch 10 times worse after it was on for 30- 60 minutes. Now I put it on the back of my knees with no itching. I then started putting it on my back and again no increase in itching. So today I tried it on my face (which remains SUPER DRY) and I had slight itching, but it really helped the skin exfoliate - so instead of itching I just peeled off a whole bunch of skin and had slightly smoother skin underneath.
Today I begin a new beginning - instead of waiting for this TSW to pass so I can live life again, I am going to start living life the best I can and let TSW lie where it may! Still going to have bad days, but I am taking the reins again and will take back my life from TSW!